Take-Out from Massachusetts to Mississippi


David Schuler of Jackson, Mississippi loading up his Town Spa pies [Photograph: Marc Vasconcellos/The Enterprise]

The Patriot Ledger reports that a transplant from Massachusetts got himself four coolers full of his favorite bar pie, 150 pizzas totaling nearly $1200, from Town Spa in Stoughton to haul back to his home in Mississippi. Talk about the Pizza Cognition Theory at work. Hell, pizza ain't THAT bad in Mississippi, is it? I haven't personally made it to Town Spa because I've heard that it is touch and go and that its glory days are thing of the past, but this Incredible Journey of Pizza probably demands follow up. (Plus, according to their website, they now have Keno. I guess there is only one choice for a dining partner.)

The Patriot Ledger gives a run down of the trial and error that proceeded the perfect transportation method:

But perfecting his cross-country pizza delivery took some trial and error. During one of his first trips, he packed several frozen pizzas into a cooler with ice - only to have the crusts absorb the melted cubes "like sponges," he said.

Then, one year, he packed 40 frozen pizzas into a mammoth suitcase and jumped on the plane. But when a hurricane diverted his flight to Birmingham, Ala., Schuler was forced to borrow his brother-in-law's truck to make the unexpected four-hour car ride home.

When he arrived, the pizzas thankfully were still frozen, but he's yet to use the suitcase again, which ran him $87 to lug onto the plane. It now sits in his house with a bright orange sticker from Logan Airport that reads, "Heavy bag."

During his last trip to Massachusetts - when he transported 100 pizzas across 12-plus states - he discovered his current formula.

Schuler stacks the sealed, partially cooked pizzas on their sides and carefully slides them into coolers. Laying a plastic ice pack across the top - notice no physical ice cubes - Schuler then sets off on his trip with no plans of stopping except for gas and bathroom breaks.

In the passenger's seat, of course, he planned to have two to three fully cooked pizzas for when he gets hungry.

Oh, and check out the pizza purchaser's incredible Massachusetts/Mississippi hybrid accent in the video.