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Totino's Pizza Stuffers: A Calzone by Any Other Name
The Impulsive Buy is always good for some, er, "convenience food" reviews. Since we kicked off the day on Slice with the kid-friendliest pizza chain in the country (RIP Showbiz), why slow down this cheap thrills pizza locomotive now?!
The best thing about The Impulsive Buy review is the what-other-foods-you-might-recognize-to-help-you-comprehend-the-pizza-pocket list. Here's what I mean:
The new Totino's Pizza Stuffers look like Totino's took their Party Pizza, folded one end over the other, and then used a mad scientist's shrink ray to get it down to a size slightly bigger than two or three of their Pizza Rolls.
Or if you eat a lot of Pizza Hut, they look like mini P'Zones.
Or if you eat a lot dim sum, they look like pizza potstickers.
Seems like the obvious comparison is just a mini calzone. Is the Pizza Hut novelty menu actually more widely recognized than a calzone? (I have a friend who admitted to having her first calzone just last week, but it wasn't like she didn't know what it was.) Has P.F. Chang's succeeded in universalizing the potsticker so that it is more familiar than a sub shop standard? For the part of the country missing sub shops (believe me, I know those parts exist because I'm from one), it's just a crescent shaped Hot Pocket with a crimped edge.
And why did they decide to call them "Pizza Stuffers"? It kind of makes me smell the dirty gym socks and teenage boy sweat just reading it.