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You think your pizza could ever come near L&B? Fuhgeddaboudit. [Photograph: Nick Solares]

Reported in the New York Daily News, mob man and L&B Spumoni Gardens' in-law Francis Guerra had his bail hearing for allegedly attacking Eugene Lombardo, owner of The Square, because his Staten Island pizza was too similar to the Sicilian slices at the highly-regarded Spumoni Gardens. (So I guess when they say family-owned in Bensonhurst, they mean "Family" owned?) Guerra had some other mob related murder charges, but according to the Daily News, the pizza beating dominated the hearing. Here's the beef:

Lombardo's two sons had previously worked at L&B in Bensonhurst, and the eatery is a perennial contender for the city's best pizza.

"That was considered disrespectful to Frank Guerra's wife's family," FBI agent Scott Curtis testified in Brooklyn Federal Court.

And while a recording was played in court of Lombardo acknowledging the hard feelings harbored by the Spumoni group, in a surprising twist, he denied that the assault ever happened!

"Nobody laid a hand on me," he said. "If they did, they better have a gun."

Lombardo, 59, continued, "This is no secret recipe. There's no patents on pizza. Why are we even having a conversation about pizza? We had an earthquake today. Why don't you ask me about that?"

(AK: Would this be a good time for a "It's JUST PIZZA!!!"?)

For more mob-related pizza tales, check this out.

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