As a writer for the people, I often try and suppress my inner pizza snob. I try and pretend that all pies are created equal, and that there is goodness to everything on a crust. Sometimes I even manage to convince myself. After all, if tens of thousands of people enjoy eating buffalo chicken pizza, there's got to be something good about it that I'm missing, right? Well today, I'm letting diplomacy take a little breather and laying out a few of my hard and fast ground rules about pizza toppings.