D. Trump Offers Worst Excuse Ever for Using a Fork to Eat Pizza

After the crazy funny tirade from John Stewart on the Daily Show last night in which he not only ranted against the Trump's decision to take special out-of-town guest Sarah Palin to Famiglia's (which, for the record, is just a small step above the highway rest-stop Sbarro's), but also railed against his use of a fork to eat said pizza ("ARE YOU EATING IT WITH A FORK? A F*&KING FORK??... Why don't you just take that fork and stick it into New York's eye?!?"), Donald Trump came back with the response above.

His excuse?

"This way you can take the top of the pizza off, you're not just eating the crust. I like not to eat the crust so that we keep the weight down at least as good as possible."

Huh?

No, wait—not quite emotional enough. Let me try again: EXCUSE ME?!?

Understandably, you might not want to eat the crust at Famiglia, but seriously THIS IS YOUR DEFENSE?!? YOU EAT YOUR PIZZA WITH A KNIFE AND FORK SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO EAT THE CRUST? I take it you eat your spaghetti with a straw so you only have to suck down the sauce and none of that fattening pasta. Or perhaps you'd like your burger served with a plastic spoon so you can scoop off the cheese and ketchup and cut down on your dangerously high beef intake.

Clearly Trump doesn't recognize or understand that crust is the whole point of pizza!

I concur wholeheartedly with Mr. Stewart when he said, "Based on how you eat pizza Donald, I'd like to see your long form birth certificate. I don't think you were really born in New York."

Amen!